Breed or not. Weep or not. Vote? Oh, you had better BRING IT.

Is it just me, or does the Night Before the Election feel like Christmas Eve?

Pookey-muffins. I am going to bed NOW because I can’t take the suspense any longer. Who’s with me?

Wow. Okay, I don’t have that much room in my bed, so you’ll just have to bunk at home! But we’ll be together in spirit!

My brain has morphed into a shifting patchwork quilt of red and blue states. Tomorrow? If you pump my arm? My eyes will do that little cartoon-slot-machine thing (CHA-CHING! CHA-CHING! ONE RED STATE! ONE BLUE STATE! DAMN! TRY AGAIN!), all day long.

Dearies. You know we will need to be strong tomorrow, to handle all that heart-pounding, NO-THEY-DIH-INT! whiplash color commentary. What? CNN’s reporting that Nader won in Ohio? WTF?!? Wait, Fox is reporting that Tina Fey and Jon Stewart are ahead in Montana? Okay, I can get behind that! Wha—no?? MY HEAD! MY HEAD! ARGGH!!!

So sleep well, sleep strong, and ROCK THAT VOTE!

And cattle-prod any undecided souls in your neighborhood or family in the direction of the nearest polling booth.

And as always, play nice.