All this over a naked bum or two!
Let’s get a few things straight:
1) I do not shove my daughter’s face into my ass cheeks and command her to sing. They did that at Guantanamo Bay. I choose waterboarding when my children misbehave, as most sane parents do.
2) I did not choose the subtitle: “…clothing-optional policy….” Nudity is strictly enforced here, as the postal carriers, UPS man, and neighbors can attest to. Our dogs are nude at all times, or we beat them.
3) I don’t fake it, Dawn. Ever. “Sensitivity” on the blog, or the big O in bed. You’ve already got your opinion about the blog, but if you’d like to whoop it up between the sheets and judge my sincerity there, email me and we’ll work something out. Then you’ll really have something to write about. That depraved woman at Breed ‘Em and Weep! Did this thing! With her tongue! What a harlot! I asked her to do it again and again so I could tell you about it!
Truly: The cruel comments knocked the wind out of me and made me want to stick a fork in the electric outlet. No lie. I did not see them coming.
Why do I write? I look forward to handing over 10,000 pages of life stories to my girls someday. I want to hand them their early years, with love. I want to give them all I can and say, “I loved you so much that I wrote this down. I was paying attention. This is what I saw. This was our life together. You mattered. You matter. You will always matter.”
My naked tushie? Not so much.
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